Gazing on a peacefully sleeping child can melt your heart, and the term “sleeping like a baby” conjures up sweet images in many people’s minds. But for new parents, accomplishing the sight of a serenely sleeping infant amidst showerless days, countless diapers and a lack of sleep can be challenging. It’s well-known that newborns and babies need a lot of sleep for optimal growth and development, but new parents may struggle to establish sleep training and a baby sleep schedule that works for their family.⁵ This article discusses newborn and infant sleep recommendations while answering common questions about sleep schedules during your child’s first year.

How Much Do Newborns Sleep?

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), newborns do not have regular sleep cycles for up to six months. Although you can expect a newborn to sleep as much as 16 to 17 hours a day, those hours are several frequent one- to two-hour naps.¹

Newborn sleep cycles differ in duration, amount, and timing from older children and adults. A newborn’s sleep patterns can initially seem random, with your baby waking and sleeping around the clock. Conversely, uninterrupted sleeping for more than four to five hours can harm a newborn’s health and is not recommended.^1,5

Newborns up to about 3 to 4 months have different sleep schedules because they are hard-wired that way. Frequent awake times allow babies to maintain adequate oxygen levels and regulate their breathing.^1,2,5 These frequent wakings are essential for optimizing breastfeeding, breastmilk production, nutrition, and growth. Irregular newborn sleep patterns contribute to parental sleep deprivation, and many new parents want to establish routines early. Just realize that as your baby grows and develops over the next few months, so will their ability to sleep in longer stretches. Understanding how your baby sleeps will help you make healthy and informed sleep choices.^1,2,5

How Much Sleep Do Babies Need?

According to the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, babies aged 4 to 12 months should sleep 12 to 16 hours daily, including naps.⁴ Parents should work with, rather than against, their child’s developmental stages when prioritizing healthy baby sleep schedules.^1,3,4

Parents interested in sleep training can begin at about four to six months if their baby is growing and feeding well. Make sure to get the okay from your pediatrician before starting. Initiating sleep training may not be reasonable until about six months when a baby’s circadian rhythm is more developed. Circadian rhythm is the body’s natural tendency to sleep at night and be awake during daytime hours. On average, most babies are not neurologically developed enough to be “taught” to sleep before four months, but some of this depends on the child and your situation.^2,3,6,16,17

There are several approaches to sleep training, and while not necessary, studies show it can improve a baby’s sleep schedule and enable parents to get more quality sleep.^5,9,10

The benefits of healthy sleep are well-known in children and include improved:^4,7,8

• Attention
• Memory
• Behavior/mood
• Learning
• Emotional regulation
• Overall physical and mental health

Should I Wake My Baby To Feed?

The answer may depend on your baby’s age, their developmental stage, and whether they had any previous or current medical concerns. Generally, breastfed babies need to nurse eight to 12 times a day in the first month, while formula-fed infants will take about eight bottles daily. Feedings could be anywhere between two to three hours apart. Frequent feedings ensure adequate weight gain in newborns. With this in mind, you should wake your baby for feedings. As infants get older, from three to six months, talk to your healthcare provider about recommendations. Still, according to the AAP, healthy growing babies do not intentionally need to wake to feed.¹

A baby who goes home after a neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) admission may have strict rules on the maximum time between feedings. Babies with special health care needs may have different feeding regimens, and you should consult your physician.^11,12

When Do Babies Start Sleeping Through the Night?

Six hours of uninterrupted sleep is considered “sleeping through the night” for a baby.¹³ According to one study, 28%-57% of infants did not regularly sleep through the night.¹³ The conclusions do not necessarily mean infants continued to wake up every one to four hours, as you may expect from a newborn, but still, they did not sleep as long as parents may hope by one year.

However, some babies may sleep six hours at night by 3 to 4 months old. If your baby is growing, otherwise healthy, and still taking naps, this is not typically a cause for concern. Every baby is different, and several factors may affect how parents can reach the goal of sleeping through the night and when.^1,14,15

Helping Your Baby Fall Asleep

First, babies need a safe place to sleep, and not all products are created equally. Ensure that any sleeping equipment you use, including reused cribs, meets safety standards. The AAP has fervently recommended that babies sleep on their backs. You may know of the “Back is Best” campaign established to reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).^1,15

• Helping your baby fall asleep depends on their age and developmental stage. Your approach to sleep time with a 2-week-old versus an 8-month-old will look quite different.
• However, some strategies to promote a healthy baby sleep schedule include the following:^1,14,16
• Respond to your baby’s sleep cues. Try putting them to bed when they are drowsy instead of already asleep.
• Talk in a quiet, soothing voice and keep the lights low.
• Try swaddling if it’s developmentally appropriate.
• Read to your baby before bedtime.
• Give your baby a gentle, relaxing bath and massage before bedtime.
• You may want your baby to sleep in the same room as you.
• Encourage awake periods and tummy time during the day.

Sleep Training

Sleep training involves slowly guiding your child into successfully self-soothing behaviors, promoting their ability to fall asleep independently at bedtime. If you plan to try sleep training, you may need to experiment with what works for your family. Some commonly known methods include:^6,9,17

• The cry-it-out method (CIO)
• The Ferber method, a graduated variation of the CIO method
• Bedtime fading, which involves gradually adjusting bedtime

Sleep is a vast and interesting topic, and there are several great resources available online aimed at helping parents establish positive, healthy newborn sleep schedules and routines for their children. Many parts of parenting are trial and error; what worked like a charm for one baby may do nothing for the next. Children are always keeping you on your toes, and getting a good night’s sleep ensures you are both ready for the next busy day.

Having a child brings up many questions. It just comes with the territory. No matter how many books you read, there’s nothing quite like lived experience. Safe sleep is an important topic, and well-meaning people may advise you on the best way for your baby to sleep. Their suggestions may include when your baby should be sleeping on their stomach. But is this a safe option?

According to CDC data from 2020, nearly 3,400 babies died from sudden unexpected infant deaths (SUID), including 1,389 from sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) and 905 from accidental strangulation, entrapment, and suffocation, often during sleep.^2,3 In 2022, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) published a new policy statement outlining safe infant sleep recommendations to reduce the risk of sleep-related infant deaths.¹

In this article, we’ll discuss safe sleep recommendations and answer parents’ burning questions about children sleeping on their stomachs and the need for tummy time.

Is It Safe for Babies To Be Sleeping On Their Stomach?

Overwhelmingly, the answer is no for the first year of life. Babies develop rapidly during their first 12 months. The ability to roll over is a milestone parents can look forward to around six months. However, some babies will start earlier.⁴ Even though they may be rolling over independently, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that “Back is best” when putting your baby to sleep at night and for all naps during their first year.⁵

How Should Babies Sleep?

Some positioning recommendations include the following:¹

• Place your baby on their back every time they sleep, including naps.
• Use a firm, flat (not inclined) surface when putting your baby to sleep.
• Babies should not sleep on the same surface as their caregivers. For example, sharing a bed, sofa, couch, or chair is off-limits for sleeping.
• Babies should sleep in the same room as their parents until at least six months old but have a separate sleeping surface like a crib or bassinet.

The AAP developed the “Back is best” initiative in the United States to combat SIDS and other sleep-related deaths. SIDS remains a leading cause of death in infants.² While doctors do not know what causes SIDS, they have identified that sleeping on their stomachs will increase a child’s risk for death from SIDS.¹

Previously, people thought that when sleeping on their backs, babies would be more likely to choke or breathe spit-up milk into their lungs (aspiration). The AAP states that a baby’s normal body responses will combat such risks.¹

Expert recommendations changed in the 1990s to recommend babies sleep on their backs, and guidelines continue to evolve.⁶ Before the changes, however, many infants slept on their stomachs. Despite the number of yearly SIDS deaths dropping after healthcare providers changed their advice to parents, it remains a significant cause of infant mortality.^3,6 Because there has been a change in infant sleep recommendations, you may have well-meaning family and friends advising stomach sleeping simply because they are unaware of this new and vital information.

When Can Babies Start Sleeping on Their Stomach?

Although SIDS can happen anytime during the first year, months 1 to 4 carry the highest risk, and 90% of deaths occur by six months. However, to ensure their baby’s safety, parents should continue to place infants on their back to sleep until their first birthday.^7,8

You may know of babies who had gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD) and were sleeping on their stomachs, perhaps with an inclined surface or wedge. Doctors no longer recommend this because research and data indicate that stomach sleeping and its risk for SIDS outweigh any benefit. Parents of babies in a neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) may see their baby lying on their stomach (“prone” position) or in a side-lying position).

This may be confusing, and you may ask health providers if this is safe. Sometimes, a hospitalized infant is positioned to sleep on their stomach or in a side-lying position for medical reasons. During this time in the NICU, these infants are on hospital monitors and cared for by specialized medical staff. However, once they stabilize, health providers will transition these infants to follow “Back is best” guidelines.¹

What if Your Baby Rolls Over While Sleeping?

Your baby’s first year is a year filled with firsts. Before you know it, your newborn will become a wiggly, curious, and active baby. Their arms and legs will be flailing around. They will be able to lift their heads, and typically, by six months, babies can roll over in both directions.⁴ They will surprise you daily because their development is rapid. Some babies can roll over earlier, so be ready because one day, you look at your little one and wonder how they did that.

So, while celebrating that your child is meeting an exciting milestone, you may be worried about sleep positioning. The AAP recommends placing your baby on their back to sleep. Even if your baby can turn themselves over, do not intentionally put them to sleep on their stomach. If they roll over while sleeping, the AAP states they can remain in that position.¹

However, a rolling baby risks getting tangled or suffocating in soft bedding, including blankets, pillows, crib bumpers, and stuffed toys. The only thing in your child’s crib should be a fitted sheet. The sleep surface should be clear and stark. Suppose you put your baby to sleep on their back and roll to their stomach. In that case, it is acceptable to leave them prone as long as the sleep surface meets all other recommendations, including consumer product safety standards.^1,9

What About Tummy Time for a Newborn?

Newborns sleep often, and their sleep patterns are typically brief at first, lasting a few hours between around-the-clock feedings.¹⁰ As a result, newborns may spend much time being held for feeds or comfort and sleeping on their backs. Tummy time helps newborns gain skills for healthy development and enables them to build on previous developmental milestones. In addition, tummy time may help to combat the development of a flat head or “positional plagiocephaly.” ¹²

Tummy time involves placing a baby on their stomach when they are awake. A caregiver must always be watching them. Never leave your baby unattended, even briefly, while on their stomach. By placing your baby on their stomach, you give them time to develop and strengthen their neck, shoulder, arm, and chest muscles, preparing them to roll over, crawl, and walk.¹¹

When To Begin Tummy Time

Tummy time for a newborn can begin within a few days after birth. Start by placing your newborn on their stomach for about three to five minutes at a time, two or three times a day, slowly increasing the duration. The AAP recommends daily 15 to 30 minutes of tummy time by week seven.^1,11

Some tummy time tips include:¹¹

• Lay your baby on a clean blanket or towel on the floor. Make sure the area is clear of hazards.
• Try tummy time after a diaper change or after waking from a nap while your baby is in a quiet but alert stage.
• Talk and interact with your newborn. You may try to get their attention with a toy.

Possibly one of the sweetest sights you can see is a peacefully sleeping baby, and keeping them safe is a priority. Always contact your healthcare provider with specific questions or concerns about your child. However, for your baby’s first year, sleeping on their stomach increases the risk of SIDS and other possible sleep-related deaths, including suffocation. But when they are awake, tummy time is essential to your child’s development. Tummy time is also fun to interact and bond with your baby as they grow and develop.

Nighttime fears and nightmares are a common occurrence among children. According to research, up to 50% of children between 3 and 6 years of age experience frequent nightmares.⁶ These nightmares, however, are part of normal development as children’s imaginations develop, and they begin to understand that there are things that exist that can harm them.⁷ Still, as a parent, you may be struggling to deal with your child’s nightmares. In this article, I’ll share tools you can pack in your hypothetical “nightmare tool belt” to help your child with this issue.

What Causes Nightmares in Children?

While there’s no exact cause of nightmares, they might be connected to your child’s worries and fears.⁸ Their fears can come from all kinds of things and places, such as real-life experiences (life events including trauma and stress), their imagination, genuinely dangerous things (snakes, spiders, etc.), or something they’ve seen on television or read in a book.^1,2 Maybe they even heard something “spooky” from a friend at school or encountered an unfriendly human or animal in the neighborhood.

Preschool-aged children (and younger) tend to be more afraid of imaginary creatures like monsters. (Have you noticed this yet? We sure have!) Older children tend to be anxious about “more realistic” fears, like burglars and natural disasters. Nightmares are most common in children aged around 10 years.^1,2

9 Tips for Helping Children Deal With Nightmares

Having an understanding of what your child may be going through is a fabulous place to start — but you will want to have a game plan for that initial middle-of-the-night, blood-curdling scream. Trust me. I don’t know about you, but I am not my sharpest at 2 a.m. Here are nine ways to deal with your child’s nightmares:

1. Try To Understand Your Child’s Fears

Don’t immediately discount them, and do not make fun of them, no matter how irrational their fear is. Try to remember what it was like to be a kid. Their fears are very real to them! So, treat your child, their fears, and the nightmares that stem from those fears with respect. Research tells us that mindful parents who are empathic toward their children’s emotions can help their children reduce their stress, aggression, anxiety, and depression.³

2. Reassure Your Child When They Are Afraid

When dealing with your child’s nightmares, it’s essential to validate and acknowledge their feelings. This can help reduce their stress when they are feeling overwhelmed.³ Remind your child that they are safe. Then tell them again! Assure them that it was only a bad dream and that you’re there for them.

3. Train Their Imagination

If their mind can conjure up scary stuff, they can also use it to combat the scary stuff!⁴ For instance, if they had a bad dream about an alien, you could ask them to imagine that they are a superhero with special powers to get rid of the alien. Or if they had a nightmare about a crocodile, get them to use their imagination and think about something happy, like singing Happy Birthday instead. Realizing they can direct their thoughts from scary to funny or empowering is huge for their confidence to manage or rid themselves of nightmares.

4. Identify Their Triggers

Try to figure out what is happening before bed to see if you can problem-solve and find their triggers. Are they too wound up? Were they watching a particular TV show? Was it a tough day at school? Did they have enough time outside in the sunshine that day? Whatever it is, keep track of when nightmares happen (or not) to see if you can do anything practical about them. You can also help your child learn coping strategies like not watching triggering shows or reading scary books before bed.⁸

5. Encourage a Nighttime Routine

Bedtime routines help our minds get prepared for sleep. The more relaxed and calm we are, the better our sleep quality. So, ensure you establish a good wind-down routine with your little one — reading stories, having snuggles, and listening to some soft or calm music should do the trick.^5,8

6. Make the Dark Fun

Dealing with nightmares often includes addressing a child’s fear of the dark. Try to make the dark less ominous. Play hide and seek or flashlight tag. Have a dance party with glow sticks. Or put glow-in-the-dark star stickers on their ceiling! Just maybe not at bedtime. 😉

7. Introduce a Security Object

Help your child find a security object, something they can sleep with every night to help them feel safe and secure. This could be a stuffed animal, a blanket, or a lovey that will help your child feel more relaxed at bedtime. Which means YOU might actually get to relax.

8. Keep a Nightlight in Their Bedroom

A nightlight can be an excellent addition to their bedroom, as it will provide a little brightness. This can help them feel safer at night. As long as it doesn’t keep your child from falling asleep (that would be counterintuitive), this can be a great idea.⁸

9. Teach Your Child Relaxation Techniques

If they are old enough to understand, teach them simple relaxation and calming techniques, like counting to 10 or taking deep breaths. They can try a mindfulness activity, like imagining they are lying on the sand next to a beautiful beach. You can’t be afraid and relaxed at the same time! Teach them that when they wake up from a nightmare, they should practice their relaxation techniques.

Dealing with your child’s nightmares can be scary for both you and them. But using these tips should help make the process a little easier. Also, don’t forget to offer a lot of praise when your child makes strides to deal with their bad dreams on their own using the techniques you’ve taught them! The more sleep your child gets, the more sleep you get. And we need all the beauty rest we can get, mamas!

Does your toddler or young child wake up crying or distressed, and you don’t know why or can’t quickly soothe them? It can be scary and leave you feeling powerless if your little one has ever had a night terror. They can be dramatic wake-ups, or your child might be distressed or disturbed and hard to settle. Although they both involve sleep, a night terror is not the same thing as a nightmare. There are things you can do to help console your child after a nightmare or even prevent it from happening, but the same can’t be said for night terrors. We will explore what the differences are, as well as some coping strategies if your baby wakes up screaming from a night terror.

What Are Night Terrors?

A night terror, also sometimes called a sleep terror, is an actual sleep disorder and part of a class of sleep disorders called “parasomnias.”^1,2 It occurs typically during the first few hours of sleep and happens during non-rapid eye movement (NREM) sleep. It can last up to 10 minutes and causes feelings of panic and distress.²

Night terrors in children occur most commonly between the ages of 4 and 12; however, they usually decrease in frequency as children grow up.³ If your child experiences one, they will wake terrified, and they can scream, shout, and move about, but they will also experience things like increased heart rate, faster breathing, and sweating.⁴ They might even be moving around and engaging with you, but they aren’t having a dream, and they aren’t actually talking to you. After the night terror, your child will seemingly go back to sleep, and they won’t remember anything in the morning.

Night Terrors vs. Nightmares

Although they might sound similar to nightmares, night terrors are entirely different. As mentioned, they are a formal sleep disorder and happen during NREM sleep, whereas a nightmare is a dream that brings up big feelings or an emotional response. Nightmares also occur during a different stage of sleep — rapid eye movement (REM) sleep — and tend to happen later in the night.⁵

Night terrors in children are something that just happens, but many things can influence nightmares. For instance, they may experience changes or stress (like moving to a new house, getting a new sibling, starting school, etc.) or see something on TV or in a book that scares them.⁶ Nightmares can even be influenced by anxiety or worries; this includes normal fears that happen during the day, such as seeing a spider or having to talk in class. A nightmare can be a normal way that children process and sort through things that are happening in their world.⁷

What Causes Them?

More often than not, night terrors aren’t something in your control, and there is some evidence that night terrors are genetic (meaning they can be passed down in families).⁸ Some research says certain health conditions like nocturnal asthma, reflux, or particular medications might have some influence, too.⁸ Finally, overall health can play a role, with night terrors being more common in those who don’t have a proper diet or good quality sleep.⁹

How You Can Comfort Your Child if They Have Night Terrors

It’s important to know that although they look upset or distressed, they aren’t having a nightmare and aren’t responding to things around them (nor will they remember things the next morning), so you can’t comfort them per se. However, there are several things you can do to help your child during a night terror, including:^9,10

• Don’t wake them: This can add to the confusion or create disorientation or distress, and your child won’t remember it the following day anyway. Leave them to sleep, and it will be over much quicker.
• Keep them safe: Make sure if they are moving about that you keep them out of harm’s way. You might stay close by and monitor them or move things they could trip on or other hazards. You can also lock the front door and remove anything sharp they could accidentally hurt themselves on.
• Take them back to bed: Try to wait for them to start settling down, or if you can, redirect them back to bed. Don’t try to talk or negotiate with them; they might look awake and responding, but they aren’t really “awake” or present and won’t understand what you are trying to do.

Is There a Treatment?

It’s a bit of a waiting game, as most children grow out of night terrors without any intervention or support.¹¹ It is essential to make sure they are safe during a night terror and ensure you don’t wake them. But the most effective treatment is helping your child improve their sleep. You could look into some potential causes, like health issues, diet, or sleep quality, and see if you can make any adjustments. For example, establishing a good nighttime routine and ensuring they don’t watch TV directly before bed or have sugary, caffeinated drinks can help them settle into a better-quality sleep.¹¹

If you are concerned about your child’s night terrors, it’s important to seek support from your doctor or other trusted health professional. You could arrange a sleep study to find out precisely what is happening or even explore medication options (however, medication is not often prescribed for night terrors).

Can You Prevent Night Terrors?

We can’t prevent night terrors, especially if they are genetic. However, you can set your child up for restful sleep by ensuring there are no underlying medical concerns and putting strategies in place to improve their quality of sleep.

Remember that night terrors can be a regular part of development, and they do occur in healthy, happy children. Despite this, night terrors and nightmares can be frightening (for our little people and us). While night terrors might not harm our children, it’s essential to address them and explore your child’s experiences with a pediatrician or your family doctor.

Does bedtime with your toddler feel like a battle? Toddler tantrums at bedtime can leave moms and dads feeling exhausted and frustrated when their usually happy little person turns into a sobbing, screaming mess. Toddler tantrums aren’t fun at any time, but when your toddler is screaming at bedtime, particularly when you have had a long day, it can be challenging. So what is causing this change, and more importantly, what can you do to bring a sense of calm back to bedtime?

What are Toddler Tantrums at Bedtime?

A toddler tantrum at bedtime is much like a regular tantrum with kicking, screaming, flailing, flopping, arching their backs, running away, or even hurting themselves. It’s a sudden outburst of emotion, loss of control, or disorganized behavior. It’s generally a way that your toddler expresses a big feeling, and it is how they communicate these feelings to us. Your toddler screaming at bedtime or fighting at bedtime is likely occurring because they haven’t developed the verbal skills to tell you what is the matter or because they haven’t yet learned how to manage or regulate their big feelings.¹

Are Toddler Tantrums at Bedtime Normal?

Toddler bedtime tantrums come about specifically in the lead-up to bedtime or are associated with sleep in some way. Essentially, sleep, or their feelings about sleeping, are a trigger of some sort. Tantrums are more likely to occur when our little people are hungry, tired, or overstimulated and during periods of transition, which are the critical elements of bedtime.²

At the end of the day, they are exhausted, and often, you ask them to stop doing something they enjoy, like playing and getting them to settle down or start getting ready for bed. Although they might be incredibly challenging, toddler tantrums at bedtime (and tantrums generally) are typical for children between 18 months and five years old.³

Why is My Toddler Screaming at Bedtime?

There are many reasons why your toddler might be screaming at bedtime, such as:^2,3,4

• Separation anxiety is a normal part of child development, so leaving you and having to go to their bedroom alone can be distressing for some children.
• FOMO (fear of missing out)! Our little people can see us, or older siblings, staying awake and feeling like they are missing out on the fun.
• Challenges being able to regulate, wind down, or self-settle
• Sudden or unexpected transitions from some enjoyable activity to having to go to bed
• Recent nightmares and subsequently feeling triggered about going to sleep
• Being overstimulated, in particular, having too much screen time before bedtime
• A desire to be more independent and feeling out of control about the choice to go to bed
• Wanting your attention
• Illness or other discomfort

How To Handle Toddler Tantrums at Bedtime

It’s essential to remain calm during your toddler’s tantrums at bedtime. I know it’s easier said than done, but if you yell, shout, or have an outburst, it can escalate things as your toddler will feed off of your emotions. So, ensure that you have strategies for calming down when tackling the nighttime routine.

Try and Identify the Trigger

Is your toddler over-tired? Are they seeking attention? Have they had a recent nightmare? Once you figure out the trigger, it can help determine which strategy might be the most effective.

Connection

Ensure your toddler has plenty of opportunities for connection and attention before bedtime. If you “fill their cup” before bedtime, they will be less likely to tantrum as a way of gaining a connection with you. If separation anxiety is at the root of their tantrum, then lots of contact, snuggles, and time together before bed can help ease their worries.

Leave Plenty of Time for Transitions

If you announce that it’s time for bed and expect your toddler to pop into bed without a fuss, you are likely to get a big reaction. Particularly if you request without warning or they are engaged in some other enjoyable activity. To remind them well in advance that bedtime is coming, you can use strategies to ease the transition like:

• Have a clock on the wall and show them how much time is left before bed.
• Use a timer or alarm to announce that bedtime has arrived. And remind them at intervals in the lead-up (30 minutes to bed, 15 minutes, 5, 1, or whatever interval suits you)
• Put up a chart with the bedtime routine so they can easily see what is next and how far through the routine they are (so they know how close bedtime is and what is coming next).
• Get preparations started well in advance. Do you want bedtime to be 7:30 pm? Don’t start the nighttime routine at 7:15. Give yourself and your toddler plenty of time so the pressure is off and you both feel calmer. If they are early to bed, you can have more time snuggling or reading together.

Have a Routine So They Know What To Expect

We like to know what is coming next; it makes us feel safe and secure. It can be easier to relax, or our body goes into autopilot because it knows what’s coming next. Stick to a straightforward routine for your toddler so things are predictable. You are helping their body recognize the cues for bedtime.

Avoid Giving In to Their Demands

Toddlers are learning how they impact those around them with their behavior (which includes tantrums at bedtime). If they realize they can delay bedtime or get that extra story by throwing a tantrum, you better believe they will keep throwing tantrums to get what they want. If you aren’t willing to continue certain activities or budge on bedtime (for example), it’s best to remain consistent and not give in; otherwise, your toddler’s tantrums at bedtime will likely escalate.⁵

Name That Feeling

Helping your child learn how to identify and label their emotions helps them feel more in control and less frustrated or scared by big feelings. It can also help you understand why they might be avoiding bedtime or becoming distressed by it.⁶

No Bribery

Bribes only work in the short term, and your toddler may learn that if they have a tantrum at bedtime, you will offer them something nice to get them to stop. This will most likely increase the behavior rather than reduce it.⁸

Watch for Sleepy Cues and React Quickly

Don’t let your toddler become overtired. They can get wired, making it harder to get them to sleep due to the hormones racing around their bodies. Watch for rubbing eyes, yawning, getting a glazed look, etc. If you spot any of these signs, move bedtime up and get moving on your nighttime routine.⁹

Give Your Child Some Control

If your little toddler’s tantrum at bedtime concerns control, give them some, so they are less likely to create a battle over bedtime. I’m not saying let them take over and rule the roost, but give them more choices in their day, like picking their PJs or the goodnight story. Get their input into the nighttime routine, like whether the bath/shower or brushing teeth comes first.

Don’t Reason With Them During Your Toddler’s Bedtime Tantrum

Your child isn’t ready to hear you amid their meltdown, nor is it always the best time to talk directly about their behavior before bed. You might pick another time or even the next day to address things or make a change.

Build Relaxation Strategies Into Their Bedtime Routine

You might want to consider teaching your child how to do certain yoga poses for kids or learn how to do relaxation breathing and then ensure each night you practice these strategies before bed to help them feel calm.

Avoid Sugary Foods and Drinks Before Bed

This one is probably self-explanatory, but it is still essential. If you want your child to be prepared for bed, avoid having stimulants like sugar or caffeine in their system.¹⁰

Don’t Try and Avoid Toddler Tantrums at Bedtime

Sometimes, when we try to avoid tantrums, we accidentally do too much for our kids or potentially are too permissive because we fear the tantrum. It’s okay if your child has some big feelings. Identify their feelings and help them find strategies to manage them, but don’t give in or tiptoe around them for fear of provoking a tantrum.

How Can You Prevent Toddler Tantrums at Bedtime?

There is no magic key or set of steps you can take that will entirely prevent toddler tantrums at bedtime. This is because they are mostly developmental in nature. They are normal; despite your best efforts, your toddler will still have tantrums occasionally. However, some strategies for how to deal with toddler tantrums or minimize the length of the tantrums or their frequency include the following:

Limit Screen Time Immediately Before Bed

Phone and computer screens emit a blue light to make the images clear and crisp. But this light interferes with our body’s natural sleep rhythm and can trick our brain into thinking it’s filtering in daylight. More simply, our brains think it’s time to be awake. In addition, the things you watch on the screen can have an input. Games, vibrant colors, and loud noises can all result in the release of stress hormones (adrenaline or cortisol) that muck about with the hormones in our body and our ability to relax, fall, and stay asleep. So limit access to screens in the hours directly before bed to prevent toddler tantrums at bedtime.⁷

Give Them Time to Exercise

Ensure they get plenty of opportunities to move their bodies in the daytime and use their energy. Ensure you give your child a chance each day to get outside, run around, and expel energy so they are nice and tired and prepared for bed.

Wind Down in Preparation for Bed

Don’t take a leaf out of my husband’s parenting playbook. He loves to play chasey games or tickling and giggling activities as he takes the kids to their bedroom. Cue an overexcited child who doesn’t want to go to bed now. Try to keep the lights dim, the screens off, and the noise to a minimum, or give them a warm bath to try and wind them down and get their bodies relaxed and ready for sleep.

Toddler tantrums at bedtime may be expected, but that doesn’t mean you have to like them or accept them. Dealing with these tantrums can be exhausting, but consistency is critical. Get your child involved in making a bedtime plan or routine, set your expectations and make them clear, prepare your child, and then stick to the plan like glue. It may take some time, but with repetition, your toddler will soon be more prepared and ready for bedtime, hopefully, minus the tantrums.

Do you find your baby wakes up as soon as your head hits the pillow every night? Parenting a newborn is beautiful but exhausting. Fortunately, a practice called dream feeding might help you catch some extra ZZZs.

Most newborns eat about eight to 12 times in a 24-hour period. Some of these feedings will occur in the middle of the night, which is developmentally appropriate for the growing infant. Yes, that’s right, as much as you might not like to hear it, night wakings are normal for babies. Feeding frequency throughout the day will vary from baby to baby.¹ The method your baby is feeding (breast or bottle) and the age of your little one will also impact the amount of times they eat each day.²

While infants require more frequent feedings to meet their growing needs, sleep as a parent becomes harder to come by. There is a practice some parents have found success with that allows babies to get the food they need while giving them a bit more sleep. This practice is called dream feeding. Dream feeding is a gentle technique that can help you fill your baby’s belly before you go to bed.³ It still allows your baby to receive the calories they need but may help coordinate your baby’s sleep pattern and allow you to have a longer stretch of sleep at the beginning of the night.¹⁰

What Is a Dream Feed?

Dream feeding is a parent-initiated feed where you feed your baby without fully waking them before you go to sleep. The baby is usually half-asleep in a dreamy state while at the breast or bottle. Sneaking in that extra feed and filling your baby’s belly can help sync your baby’s longest stretch of night sleep with yours. Your baby is less likely to wake from hunger right after you fall asleep, giving you some much-needed rest.⁴

Why You Should Try To Dream Feed Your Baby

After many sleepless nights, most parents are looking for a solution to try to get their baby to sleep longer stretches. Dream feeding isn’t guaranteed to work for every family, but it could benefit you and your little one.

It’s best to try dream-feeding your baby when they can sleep for three- or four-hour stretches between nighttime feeds. This varies depending on the infant but usually lasts six weeks to four months. Fortunately, sleep feeding doesn’t interfere with your baby’s need to feed at night. It helps you shift your baby’s feeding schedule so that it is more conducive to your sleep.^4,5

How To Dream Feed

The timing of the dream feed will vary depending on when your baby goes to sleep for the night and when you go to bed. You will want to take your baby out of their bed about three to four hours after their bedtime feeding and try to offer a full feeding while they are still asleep. For instance, if your little one goes to bed around 6-7 p.m., you will feed them around 10 p.m. before you settle in for the night, hopefully giving you a few hours of uninterrupted sleep.⁴

A sample schedule would go something like this:

• 6 p.m. — Feed the baby
• 6:30 p.m. — Bedtime routine
• 7 p.m. — Baby goes to sleep
• 10 p.m. — Dream feed
• 10:30 p.m. — You go to sleep
• 2-4 a.m. — Baby wakes to feed
• 6-8 a.m. — Morning feed

The above sample schedule is just that — a sample. Everyone’s feeding “schedule” will be different. Make sure to follow your infant’s cues and feed them when it’s best for them.

Dream Feed Tips

Here are our top tips for successful dream feeding.

Find the Right Time

Choose a time at least 30 minutes before you typically go to sleep, allowing time for the feeding and for the baby to be held upright before being put back down to sleep.

Keep It Calm and Quiet

The main goal of a dream feed is for the baby to stay asleep. Dim the lights and keep the environment quiet, peaceful, and relaxed to avoid fully waking up your baby.

Use Proper Feeding Techniques

Breastfeeding may require gentle assistance to ensure your baby is latched correctly, especially if they are extra sleepy. If bottle feeding, consider using a slow-flow nipple and paced feeding to prevent overfeeding or choking.⁷

Safety First

Don’t force a breast or bottle in your baby’s mouth if they won’t latch. You can try to rouse your baby gently, but if they aren’t interested in eating, it’s best to let them sleep until they are ready to feed again.⁸ You also want to pick up your baby. Never feed your baby while they are lying in their crib or prop a bottle up.⁹

Burping Depends on Your Baby

The need to burp after the feeding depends on the baby. Burping may wake the baby, but if your baby is prone to gas or spitting up, you may want to gently burp them before laying them down.

Consult a Professional

Talk to your pediatrician or lactation consultant to ensure that dream feeding is the right choice for you and your baby.

Benefits of Dream Feeding

Here are some of the benefits of a dream feed.^4,11

• Rested parents: Offering a feed before you go to bed will help you get a longer stretch of much-needed sleep.
• Extended sleep: Dream feeding may help babies sleep for longer stretches. Offering a feeding while the infant is asleep may prevent them from waking up due to hunger during the night.
• Predictable nighttime routine: Babies thrive on routine, so dream feeding can help establish a predictable nighttime routine.

When To Stop Dream Feeding

You may want to stop dream feeding if you or your baby aren’t benefiting from it. For example, if your baby wakes up during the feeding and doesn’t easily fall back asleep or continues to wake up frequently throughout the night.⁴

If it’s working, there’s no need to rush to drop it. As babies start growing and sleeping longer stretches, the need for sleep feeds will naturally decrease. Some babies will continue until 6-9 months of age, while others may drop it sooner.^4,6

Dream feeding can be a valuable tool for parents seeking to catch extra ZZZs. By choosing an appropriate time, creating a calm environment, and maintaining safety considerations, dream feeding can be a positive addition to your baby’s sleep routine.

The stillness of nightfall often ushers in a dance that only mothers know. It’s a dance orchestrated with soothing whispers, tranquil lullabies, and the enchanting rhythm of a heartbeat. Yet, this magical dance, soothing your little one into a realm of peaceful dreams during a bedtime routine, can feel like a never-ending marathon when your baby decides that only mom can lead.

While this bond is wonderful, it can also be exhausting and isolating for other caregivers longing for their turn. Sweet Mama, you’re not alone; we’re here to guide you through possible solutions.

Embrace a Bedtime Routine as a Team Sport

A consistent bedtime routine is like a lullaby that starts long before the lights are dimmed. The warm bath full of giggles and playful splashes, the tender touch during a gentle massage, the magic tucked away in every storybook page, and that final, calming feed.¹

You’ve probably choreographed these into fine art that could rival any Broadway show. But how about inviting Dad, Grandma, or other caregivers to join this bedtime concert? They can participate by taking on roles in this routine, slowly becoming familiar faces in your baby’s dreamscape. Over time, your little one will realize bedtime routine comfort isn’t a performance limited to mom.²

Invite Others to the Daytime Party

Babies, much like us, are creatures of habit. They learn through repetition and consistency. Inviting other caregivers to be an integral part of the daytime routine can help your little one recognize there are more members in their fan club.³

Encourage other caregivers to dive into playtime, engage in mealtime, or even win the occasional “silly face” contest. These interactions can gently familiarize your baby with different caregivers and their unique styles, making the transition smoother when it’s time to kiss the moon goodnight.

Harness the Power of a Cuddle Buddy

Nothing compares to mom’s scent; it’s like an invisible cuddle that assures your baby everything is okay. A comfort item, like a small blanket or a soft toy, might be the perfect understudy when mom’s arms can’t be there. Let it soak up mom’s scent during the day, and it might just trick your little one into a sense of familiarity and security when night falls.⁴

However, following the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) Safe Sleep Guidelines is essential when introducing a cuddle buddy. These guidelines advise that soft objects, including plush toys, should not be in the crib with a baby younger than 12 months due to the risk of suffocation. Always prioritize your baby’s safety above all, and consider introducing these comfort items when they reach an appropriate age.⁵

Take Baby Steps Toward Bedtime Routine Independence

We’ve all heard the saying, “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” That couldn’t be truer when helping your baby adjust to new caregivers during their bedtime routine.

Change is often more comfortable when it’s gradual. Trying to pass the baton of the bedtime routine too quickly can overwhelm your little one. A slow transition might look like Mom starting the bedtime routine and another caregiver stepping in to finish. Little by little, as your baby grows accustomed to other caregivers, you can begin to bow out earlier.

Cultivating the Art of Soothing

Every caregiver has a unique soothing style, a signature move, if you will. Dad may not be able to mimic your soft lullabies, but perhaps he can weave enchanting bedtime stories. Or maybe Grandma has a repertoire of old nursery rhymes that could do the trick. Encouraging others to find their rhythm can add to the soothing techniques your baby experiences, making bedtime more inclusive, diverse, and harmonious.

Navigating the Bedtime Routine Path with Patience

No two babies are identical, just like no two snowflakes are identical. Some babies might take to these changes like a duck to water, while others may require more time and patience.

It’s not a race and doesn’t reflect on anyone’s abilities as a caregiver. You and your little one are on a unique journey together. Remember to be patient with yourself, other caregivers, and your baby. This adjustment period is only a chapter in your baby’s beautifully illustrated story of growing up.

Enjoying the Benefits of Shared Bedtime Routines

So, sweet Mama, know that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed, and it’s okay to need a break. You’re doing an incredible job!

By sharing the bedtime routine with other caregivers, your baby can feel comfortable and secure with multiple people, fostering a sense of independence and flexibility. This can be a cherished opportunity for the caregivers to bond with the baby and understand their unique quirks and cues. And let’s not forget the importance of your well-being. Involving others in a bedtime routine can provide you with much-needed rest and self-care time, knowing your baby is in safe and capable hands.

New baby essentials, like onesies and hats, are almost always at the top of a parent’s wishlist when they find out they’re expecting. But experts are now advising against adding one popular item to shopping carts and registries: weighted sleep gear.

These products have been gaining momentum thanks to the success of their grown-up counterparts. Many people have celebrated weighted blankets for their ability to do everything from soothing anxiety to helping with sensory issues. However, doctors and safe sleep experts say newborns and infants should never use these products.

Parents Have Been Using the Beefed-Up Swaddles To Get Some Shut-Eye

Weighted blankets and swaddles have become popular thanks to claims that they can help babies recreate the womb’s environment and reduce their startle reflex, which sometimes accidentally wakes sleeping infants.

But Dr. Rachel Moon, a pediatrician at the University of Virginia and chair of the American Academy of Pediatrics’ task force on Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), tells NPR that these products are “not safe” and parents should avoid them.

“Some parents like it because the baby will sleep longer and so the parents can sleep longer, but the sleeping longer is actually what is dangerous,” she said in the interview.

Sleep Experts Are Also Sharing Their Concerns

Despite many people singing these products’ praises, people like Michelle Barry, the founder and president of Safe Infant Sleep, say there isn’t enough regulation to ensure their safety.

“We live in a time where, for the most part, if you want it you can find it. The products that are out there are overwhelming,” she told NPR. “It’s great that we have so many options, but at the same time it’s also worrisome.”

Even the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) has noted some concerning reports about the weighted swaddles and sacks. The CPSC told NPR it has received at least one report of a death. It has also seen complaints about the weighted materials making it harder for babies to move. In some cases, the weighted material has even become dislodged from the chest and moved toward a sleeping baby’s neck!

Their Worries Are Backed Up by Science

Dr. Moon explains that her concerns stem from the fact that a baby’s body can’t withstand extra weight. She notes that their ribs are made of cartilage, a connective tissue far less stable than bone. “So if you put a weight on it, it’s going to deform, and it’s going to press down on the lungs and on the heart.”

Additionally, there’s concern that the products could work too well, enticing infants to sleep through their typical wake periods and miss feedings. What’s worse, she also says a deep enough sleep could prevent them from waking up if they aren’t getting enough oxygen.

The Manufacturers Stand By Their Products

NPR also connected with representatives from companies like Nested Bean and Dreamland Baby. Both say their products allow parents and babies to increase the quality and quantity of their sleep.

“Our products are helping a lot of babies and parents,” Nested Bean’s founder Manasi Gangan told NPR. “Those who have used [them] swear by our products.”

What You Should Do Instead

While it may be frustrating for tired parents to hear that they shouldn’t be using a method that has worked for them in the past, Dr. Moon says there are a few other parent-tested and doctor-approved things you can do instead. “We do recommend swaddling. We do recommend pacifiers. We recommend rocking and shushing,” she explained. “There are a lot of things that you can do, but please don’t use a weighted blanket or swaddle.”

When my daughter was born, I was set on having her sleeping in her crib. Over time, though, I realized we all slept better when she was close. Contact napping turned into co-sleeping at some point, and co-sleeping turned into something that brought about all sorts of mixed emotions. But there are some thoughts co-sleeping parents think at night. Every night.

While we’ve adapted and made it work, some things haven’t changed. If your sleeping arrangements include your child snuggled up close to you, you can probably relate to what I’ve experienced while sharing a bed with my little snuggle bug. Here are some thoughts every co-sleeping parent has in the middle of the night.

10 Things Co-Sleeping Parents Think at Night

Here are 10 things co-sleeping parents think of in the middle of the night.

1. Finally, a Good Night’s Rest for Everyone

Maybe you’re co-sleeping because you’ve always intended to. Perhaps you’re doing so because it’s the only solution you’ve found to save your sanity and get your little one to sleep manageable stretches at night. Regardless of the “why,” the relief that comes with a decent night’s rest is palpable.

2. I Miss Stretching Out

As much as I love snuggling up to my baby, I long to sleep on my stomach again one day. Or simply stretching out beyond the parameters of what’s safe for co-sleeping. As comforting as having my tiny human close is, my back might not always be quite as appreciative.

3. Wow, I Am the Luckiest Person in the World

There’s nothing like gazing down at the person you created as they lay asleep, as peaceful as can be, cozy and content in your arms. It’s easy to forget how much I miss stretching out when I’m caught up in awe of my sweet baby, and I’ll always cherish the quiet moments we get to share while co-sleeping.

4. How Can I Move Their (Leg/Hand/Arm) Without Waking Them?

As ridiculous as it sounds, every co-sleeping parent knows what it’s like to wake up nestled below random limbs at all hours. There’s a fine art to maneuvering any peacefully sleeping child while maintaining what little space you have for yourself when sharing a bed with your kiddo, and co-sleeping gives you plenty of chances to hone it.

5. I Wish We Could Freeze Time

Even with having to give up my space for the time being, there’s nothing I wish I could do more than freeze time while my babies are still tiny and wanting to cuddle up next to me. Co-sleeping isn’t for everyone, but I will look back and miss it one day (or one night).

6. I Really Miss My Partner

Apart from committing to giving up some of my personal sleep space, co-sleeping also means being okay with putting quiet time with your partner on pause – at least temporarily. Even though my husband is right beside me (well, on the other side of our toddler) every night, he feels so far away sometimes. As much as I love having the whole family together in one spot, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss snuggling up to my partner.

7. If My Baby Were in Their Own Room, I’d Miss Them

As a co-sleeping mom, I’m grateful for the extra bonding time nighttime brings. Although it can be tempting to change our routine and get my bed back, I know deep down that I’d miss my little one if we were to do that.

8. Is My Tiny Human OK?

While this one might be more common for those new to co-sleeping, I’m willing to bet it’s normal for bed-sharing parents – like any parent – to wake up at any point and immediately check to ensure their little babe is safe and sound. Those who co-sleep can find that it brings us and our babies a lot of comfort, but that doesn’t mean we go without any worry.

9. Are We Sleeping Better Than We Would Be Otherwise?

As parents, we have countless decisions about everything under the sun regarding raising our children. For a topic as controversial as co-sleeping, there are times when I can’t help but wonder if we’re doing what’s in everyone’s best interest to get through each night.

10. It Couldn’t Get Any Better Than This

Co-sleeping wasn’t my initial plan when I became a mom. I don’t think it was my husband’s, either. Yet here we are, two and a half years in, and welcoming our daughter into our bed with open arms whenever she decides she needs me. And to be honest, I don’t mind one bit. Because it really couldn’t get any better than this.

Regarding sleep, what works for one family might not work for another. Co-sleeping makes sense for mine. At least for now, that is. If it works for yours, too, there’s a good chance you can relate to many of these thoughts that run through my mind on any given night.

Sleep is essential for our overall health and well-being. Parents know all too well the value of a good night’s rest. However, achieving quality sleep can be challenging, especially when constantly bombarded with noises that disrupt us. Fortunately, different noises can help drown out the disturbances and create a serene sleep environment. These noises, often called color noises, include white noise, brown noise, pink noise, blue noise, and green noise. Let’s explore the benefits of each and how you can use them to get more restful sleep.

What Do Color Noises Like White Noise Do?

According to licensed clinical health psychologist Dr. Shantha Gowda, “All color noises can help with achieving more quality sleep because they mask other sounds in the environment. When listening to any of these sounds while sleeping, you are less likely to hear unwanted sounds, such as housemates. Or family members making noise, birds chirping, cars honking, construction, partner snoring, etc.”

By blocking out these disturbances, color noises create a tranquil backdrop that promotes uninterrupted sleep, Gowda says. Think of color noises as sounds that help you relax and sleep better. Scientifically, these noises are a part of the broader concept of “colored noise.” Acoustics uses the term to describe sounds with specific spectral characteristics. These noises have distinct patterns of frequency distribution that can be utilized to create a soothing, sleep-inducing environment.¹

What is White Noise?

White noise is perhaps the most well-known and widely used color noise. It falls right in the middle of that sound spectrum. Each color noise corresponds to different frequencies. The intensity of the sound is proportional to the power of that frequency. So, white noise sits within that sweet spot in the middle, providing a balanced mix of frequencies to help you relax and sleep better. It’s a constant sound that encompasses all frequencies audible to the human ear.²

Dr. Gowda highlights that white noise mimics the sound of blood flow in the womb, making it especially comforting for infants. White noise serves as a reliable sleep aid for adults by drowning out external noises and providing a consistent auditory cue for sleep. Its gentle and soothing nature can also help people fall back asleep more quickly when they wake up at night.

What is Pink Noise?

While white noise is the go-to option for many, other color noises are gaining attention for their potential benefits. Finding the right sound for you is a matter of trying out colored noises and determining what makes you feel the best. Pink noise, for instance, has been linked to possible memory-boosting effects. Dr. Gowda notes, “There is more research conducted with white noise. However, other noises are getting more attention, especially the possible memory-boosting effects of pink noise.”

Pink noise, characterized by a deeper, fuller sound than white noise, may enhance memory consolidation during sleep. So, if you’re looking to boost your brainpower while you sleep, pink noise might be worth a try.²

What is Brown Noise?

Similarly, brown noise, with its deeper and more bass-heavy tones, can promote relaxation and deeper sleep. If your idea of peace is sleeping in a rainstorm or near a body of water, brown noise is perfect for playing as you drift off because it resembles the low rumble of thunder or the gentle roar of ocean waves. Brown noise is characterized by its power spectral density, which decreases by six decibels per octave as the frequency increases. This creates a soothing and relaxing effect on the auditory senses, like the calming sound of a steady rainfall or the rustling of leaves in a forest.^2,3

Blue and Green Noise Benefits

We can describe blue noise as being bright and used at lower volumes because, at high volumes, it can be harsh, according to Gowda. It can mask distracting noises, helping to improve focus and productivity during waking hours, and may benefit those who struggle with daytime sleepiness.

Lastly, we associate green noise, Gowda says, with its balanced blend of low and high frequencies, with nature and offers a harmonious soundscape that can induce relaxation and tranquility.

How To Use Color Noises To Help You Sleep

Now that we understand the benefits and differences of these color noises, how can we incorporate them into our sleep routine? Sound machines are an excellent option for creating a sleep-friendly environment. Gowda advises, “Sound machines are also a great option for people who do not adjust well to earplugs.”

When using a sound machine, it’s essential to place it several feet away from your bed or your child’s crib if you’re adding sleep sounds into your little one’s nighttime routine. The volume should not exceed 50 decibels to ensure a safe and comfortable sound level. For a bonus, consider placing the sound machine in an area of your sleep environment where disruptive sounds tend to enter, like a shared wall or a window facing a busy street. This strategic placement will maximize the noise-masking effects and help create a serene sleep sanctuary. Dr. Gowda encourages her patients to experiment with sound machines consistently for two weeks to observe any improvements in their sleep. She says, “Many of my patients are surprised by the improvements, often experiencing fewer awakenings and less total wake time at night.”

In the pursuit of quality sleep, color noises like white noise are powerful tools to combat the disruptive sounds that often plague our nights. Whether it’s the womb-like embrace of white noise or the memory-boosting potential of pink noise, these auditory aids can help you create a tranquil sleep environment. So, if you’re seeking a natural and non-invasive way to enhance your sleep, try color noises and let them work their magic. Your sound adventure may lead to the rediscovery of restful nights and refreshed wakeups. Sweet dreams, here you come.